


Voices

by Dawn Cunningham (Delta_Dawn)



Series: Silliness [1]
Category: Highlander: The Series
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-14
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-14 23:16:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7194914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Delta_Dawn/pseuds/Dawn%20Cunningham
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was written early in my fanfic writing 'career'. I was having problems with a story... and as I laid tossing and turning in bed, this came to me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Voices

Standard disclaimers apply. The characters Richie Ryan, Tessa Noel, Duncan MacLeod and Methos belong to Rysher.

Sandra McDonald, Angela Mull and Cindy Hudson are being used without permission or advanced warning.

This is either a shameless plug for my stories or it's revenge. I'll let you decide. Blame this story on lack of sleep.

**********

Voices by Dawn Cunningham.

"Oh, man, *she's* at it again," Richie moaned. "And I don't think it's going to be pretty."

"Who?" Duncan asked.

"Dawn. You know that fan fiction writer from Iowa. God, who would live in Iowa? I bet there's snow on the ground there."

"Oh, *her*. I thought you might be complaining about Angela again. And there's snow on the ground in a lot of different states."

"It might as well be Angela. Dawn's almost as bad. I still haven't gotten laid yet in any of her stories."

"You did get the girl in that dog story!"

"Yeah. After eight years! And that was more an afterthought. She wrote that segment after she posted the rest of the story. And that story started out so good! I thought I was getting it on a regular basis for a while until I found out that the *girl* I thought I had stashed in my room was really a dog! What a let down."

"I thought you liked the dog?"

"Okay, so that part was pretty cool but then she made me give him up at the end. Serves her right, getting all those E-mails complaining about it."

"You know that she had to get rid of the dog. You didn't have one in the series. At least she didn't have the dog get hit by a car."

"She couldn't do that. Think of the hate mail she would have got from all of the animal lovers. It's okay to torture us but don't hurt the animals too much."

"Well at least you haven't ended up in the hospital yet. How many times has Angela put you there? Twice?"

"The only reason Dawn didn't send me to the hospital in that amnesia story was so that she could have me wandering the streets. She didn't even bother to write a new reason for me to be afraid of hospitals, she just borrowed Angela's story."

"Be grateful. All I get to do in her stories is worry about you."

"Ha! You got a fight scene and a Quickening in that amnesia story."

"Right. But she almost let me lose! It's pretty obvious that you're her favorite character. All of her stories revolve around you."

"Not that bank robbery one. She sent Tessa and me inside that bank and totally forgot about us until the end. *You* were the main character in that story."

"Right. And what did I do? I worried about you and Tessa. I didn't even get to rescue you in that one."

"I think that was the whole point. You should also be grateful that you get to make out with Tessa in all of her stories even if she doesn't actually write the scenes."

"Wait a minute," Tessa popped in. "At least you guys get to do something in her stories. I usually just get to offer comfort."

"Now, Tessa, you got to do more in that amnesia story. You were the one who badgered the police to get more information."

"Thanks to Sandra. Dawn just had me crying in every scene and spending all of my time in the kitchen."

"Well you must admit that you got a bigger role in that story about the island," Richie said. "I was the one making all the mistakes and having the evil foster father flashbacks."

"At least you get flashbacks." Duncan complained. "She hasn't given me any yet. I think she's too lazy to do any historical research. Besides, you shouldn't be talking about the island story. You know how ticked off Dawn gets when list stories refer to zine stories. Especially ones that haven't been published yet!"

"Oops. You're right. Okay, I won't mention the island story again. I don't even want to think about it anyway. I'm more concerned with what she's going to do to me in her latest story. So far, I've ticked off you and Tessa, made a fool of myself at the airport security gate, been pushed around, threatened by armed men, suffered from heat exhaustion, and the story is still being written."

"We were all threatened, Richie. After all, the plane was hijacked. You seemed pretty excited about the concept of hot babes in bikinis," Duncan reminded him.

"Knowing Dawn, I doubt I'll ever get there. I have a really bad feeling about this story."

"Be grateful. At least you're in her stories." Methos popped in.

"You can't be here. You aren't in any of her stories," Richie pointed out.

"Yes I was! But it's that zine story that hasn't been published yet."

"Oh yeah. I forgot about that one."

"I wonder why," Duncan teased.

"Hey! You try finding out that you're head has been chopped off in the first few paragraphs of the story and see how you like it!"

"At least you didn't have Duncan coming after you in revenge! And Dawson was threatening to reveal to the Watcher Organization that I was Methos instead of Adam Pierson."

"Serves you right. But I really don't want to talk about that story and since it's a zine story we shouldn't anyway."

"You're right, Richie. Besides, there's something else you should worry about now." Duncan warned him.

"Oh no! Now what!"

"She has Cindy Hudson beta-reading for her now. And we all know how much Cindy likes to torture you too. Let's see, she poisoned you how many times in that one story? And then there was the one where you fell into the river and almost died."

"Great. Just great. It was bad enough when Sandra kept suggesting extra things Dawn could do to me. Now she has Cindy doing it too. I'm doomed. Why does she keep doing this to me?"

{It's because you're so cute, Richie}

"Cute! I'm not cute. I'm supposed to be one of the hunks of the show."

"I can do cute." Methos popped back in.

{Sorry, Methos. Richie is much more fun to torture than you are. And add in Duncan to worry about him and you have a perfect story line.}

"Fine. Be that way. There are other fan fiction writers out there. Even Sandra has written stories about me."

{Remember how her last story ended? Richie killed Duncan, took a dark Quickening and is headed in your direction. I would be really worried if I were you.}

"Oh yeah. Forgot about that one. Maybe I had better go find a holy spring somewhere. Where was I living? Australia? Bye." Methos popped back out.

{Now if you don't mind, people, it's one thirty in the morning and I really want to get some sleep.}

"No way. I want to talk about where your new story is headed."

{Richie, you know that I usually end up changing my mind fifty times while I write the story. What I have in mind for you will probably end up being totally different when I start typing.}

"Just answer this. Will I get to hang out on the beach with girls clad in scanty bikinis? Or even better, a topless beach! I heard they had those down in the Caribbean too. Yeah, that would work."

{Stop drooling or I'll send you to one of those nude beaches that I saw when I was down there a few years ago. I'm sure a lot of the fan fiction writers would pop in to see that. In fact, let me just go drop an E-mail to Sandra, Cindy and Angela so they can be prepared...}

"They'd probably bring their cameras too! And you would give me a bad sunburn. Okay. I'll behave."

{Good. Now can I go to sleep?}

"But what about the story?" Richie whined.

{Listen, Richie, let me get some sleep now and maybe, just maybe I'll let you be the hero in my next story. I've got this great idea about how you will have to rescue Duncan...}

"Rescue me! You can't do that. I'm supposed to be the hero of the show." Duncan protested.

{Quiet! If you don't let me get some sleep, I'm not going to write any more stories at all and then where will you be?}

"Shutting up. You won't hear another sound from us the rest of the night. I prom....mmmph!" Richie's words were choked off as first Tessa then Duncan clapped their hands over his mouth.

{Why did I ever start writing fan fiction?}

Silence

Several hours later.

"Imagine that. Me getting to rescue you, Mac. I wonder what kind of trouble she's going to put you in? Maybe I can convince her to forget the story she's working on and start on that one instead."

"Don't even think about it. I still don't think it's right that I would need to be rescued anyway."

"Do you think it's going to be another first season story? Maybe, I'll be an Immortal for this one and get a Quickening."

"If you're Immortal then I can't be in the story," Tessa complained.

"But I could be." Methos popped back in. "I could help you save him."

"She didn't say anything about my needing help. Get you're own story."

{That does it. Now I'm mad.}

"Umm...guys... why is she turning on her computer at five thirty in the morning?"

"Relax, Richie. You know that she always checks her E-mail before she goes to work."

"But she's off work for three more days for the holidays! And look she's starting her editor up."

"She's probably just going to work on her hijacking story some more."

"I don't know, guys. This doesn't feel right. I think I need to go do some research or something." Methos popped back out.

"Chicken!" Richie snorted. "No wonder he never gets in any of her stories. He doesn't hang around long enough to give her any ideas."

"He might be right. I think she's writing down our conversation from earlier this morning."

"She can't do that! We'll look like whining kids. You talk to her, Mac."

"Dawn! Don't do this to us! Besides, everyone will think you're crazy if you start writing about voices in your head."

{My family, friends, and co-workers already think I'm crazy. None of them understand fan fiction or even watch Highlander!}

"Okay. But now all the list readers will think so too."

{So what. It's not like I'm going to meet any of them face to face.}

"You never know. Look at how you managed to bump into Sandra at the Denver convention in October. If you go to that other convention in May you might run into someone there as well. And what about the next Highlander convention?"

{I'll risk it. Besides, I can always put a fake name on my ID badge.}

"Mac! Stop her! Hey, wait a minute, I didn't say that!"

{Yes you did. I have an excellent memory especially when it comes to your whining.}

"Be reasonable, Dawn. You can't blame this all on us. We didn't make you drink that caffeine last night. That's why you couldn't sleep."

{Doesn't matter. Maybe this will teach you a lesson.}

"No! Please! I'll do anything you want in the story. I don't care about the bikinis. Go ahead and torture me some more. No! Wait! Don't start your E-mail program. What about spell checking and beta-reading?"

{Thanks for reminding me about spell checking but this story is so short I'm not going to have it beta-read. Okay, spelling is fine.}

"Listen. I'll tell you what. Don't post this and I'll help you think of new ways to torture me. You could have someone shoot me or knife me."

{Those have been done before.}

"Okay. How about a long swaying bridge. You know that I don't like heights. Oops, Cindy did that in her last story. No! Wait! Don't push that button. Nooooooo!"

{E-mail sent. Good. Time for breakfast and then maybe I will work on my hijacking story. See if they've learned their lesson about cooperating.}

The end.

Happy Holidays everyone!

Author's notes:

The list stories I have referred to are: 

Old Friends, New Friends  
Richie's Best Friend  
A Day Of Thanks  
The Long Wait

I was writing Caribbean Getaway when I wrote this.

The Methos zine story was Friendships

The island story was Lessons Of Life. 

Richie gets to save Duncan in A Life For A Life

References were made to the following stories of Cindy Hudson:

Though This Be Madness  
No Good Deed

References were made to the following stories of Angela Mull:

Flood  
A Knock at the Door

References were made to the following story of Sandra McDonald:

Return of Darkness

I have no idea whether any of these stories are available online anymore. All of my stories are on this website.


End file.
